On Thursday evening I caught the first episode of Anne Robinson’s Britain on BBC1 and this episode focused on parenting. I was watching fairly unconsciously until Editor-in-Chief of Elle Magazine UK, Lorraine Candy got featured and suddenly I took an interest.
Long-term readers of ClaireySweetie will know how much I admire Lorraine and was lucky enough to meet her a couple of years ago at an event and properly fan-girled (here)!
Women and having it all
For women everywhere, having it all seems to be the thing we’re all striving for because this is what society tells us: to have it all means you can be a super mum and a successful career woman…apparently.
What seems to be forgotten here is that women are their own people too, while any mother has a responsibility to bring up her children, she also has a right to treat her career as something to achieve personal success in for her, and not just to bring in income for the family.
Some careers have quite short, but intense lifespans and although Lorraine has been Editor for over 10 years now at Elle magazine, it won’t be forever and there will come a time where she will take a step back from the role for reasons both of pace, but also because it’ll be time whereby it needs someone new to head it up.
When Anne Robinson asked if Lorraine was a good mother, it really irked me but I love that Lorraine responded by saying sometimes she was a 10, and other times she was a two. She knows that she probably isn’t home as much as she could be, but she’s also teaching each of her four children the value and importance of a good work ethic.
For me I am at that stage whereby I am really fighting with knowing if having a baby soon is the right thing, amongst all the other questions around am I really ready etc.
But I had this thought following my boss’s 50th birthday, that as it stands currently, he still has a decent 15 years left of working before retirement. Let’s say that I decided to give up work for the duration of my thirties, returning at 40; regardless of whether I would enter back at the right level, I still would have 28 years to make a career for myself. So often we forget this.
Women absolutely can have it all, but it doesn’t all need to be now, so why this obsession to achieve and do everything now?
I also kind of relish that regardless of the financial impact, all being well, when I do come to have a family, I can take a bit of a career break. One of the reasons I went to university was because I so badly missed having summers off and I think the thought of being in a career so young freaked me out a bit.
While university was categorically the best thing I have ever done for myself academically, it also gave me that time and opportunity to do that additional bit of growing I felt I needed.
The thought of being dictated to by an employer about how much time off I can have to raise children and when, really doesn’t sit comfortably with me which is why the freelance life really is attractive, but I have to be realistic, while going self-employed offers flexibility, it doesn’t offer security.
I’m not quite sure exactly what I wanted to get across in this post, but I definitely feel I need to just discuss what it means by having it all? What does it mean for you?
Until next time x
