Planning a hen party is a headache. The task sounds simple enough but it couldn’t be further from the truth, but don’t worry as in this post I share my top tips for how to organise a successful do in five easy steps.
Obtain a brief from the bride
Before you do anything, ask the bride what she wants. Every Bride is different; some will know exactly what she wants, others will have a vague idea, and some won’t have any clue at all and will ask you to just surprise her.
As part of the brief, understand a price point. Of course the bride’s costs will be divided up between those attending where possible, but by understanding what she would expect the day/weekend to cost, will help you work out how simple or elaborate the day/weekend might be.
I passionately object to expensive hen and stag parties; I think it’s so unnecessary and unfair on those attending. It’s always better for people to not be able to attend something owing to their availability, rather than because they can’t afford it. I even had a friendship end because she priced me out of things.
It’s also important at this stage to determine how much involvement your bride wants in the planning process. Is your role simply to provide administrative support? Does she want final say on all decisions? or are you doing everything because she wants the day to be a surprise?
Get a guest list
The next thing you need from the bride as part of planning a hen party is a guest list and I don’t just mean names. You haven’t got time to be hunting people down on Facebook if you’re not already friends so you need her to provide their name, phone number and email address.
Set up a Facebook group and/or WhatsApp group
Setting up a Facebook and/or WhatsApp group for planning a hen party is a really easy way to capture everyone in one place to share ideas and confirm plans.
Generate ideas
If you take only one thing from this post, take this: welcome suggestions from others but stick to your gut! When planning a hen party remember that you have been tasked with organising your mate’s hen party because she trusts you.
Friends of the bride will come forward with their own ideas for the day and that is totally fine, and some of these ideas you can take forward, but you must also trust your instinct for what you feel the bride will most enjoy.
You will no doubt come up against (well meaning) family members or friends of the bride who have nothing better to do than question your every decision and tell you you’re clearly planning a day for you and not for the bride, but trust your gut.
No one when planning a hen party is going to organise a day or weekend knowing it will be a car crash in the making, your life will simply not be worth living afterwards and the wedding day will be unbearable.
Confirm activities & collect money
Depending on what you have chosen to do, you may need to pay upfront, albeit just a deposit to secure the booking(s). Sometimes collecting money off of people can be a nightmare, and that’s not because some people won’t pay, but often they just need a good kick up the backside to transfer funds.
Let hen party guests know in plenty of time how much things will cost and when you will need money transferring to you, and don’t be afraid to put out an email a week or a few days ahead of the deadline to remind them monies are due.
Sometimes things do happen where people have to pull out last minute and that’s never ideal, and to be honest it’s your call if it’s too late for them to have their money refunded back to them. I appreciate that sounds mean but often group costs are divided between a number of people so a last minute cancellation might escalate the otherwise agreed costs for everybody else. Just something to bear in mind.
Finalise the agenda for the hen party
The week before the hen do it’s a good idea to send out a final communication (email, Facebook etc.) to finalise plans and confirm timings for any activities so everyone knows where they need to be and when.
The best kind of hen parties are those that include a range of activities that guests can pick and choose what they can and would like to attend. Therefore a finalised agenda is particularly useful for those who may not be joining in with everything so they know where to meet up with the rest of the party.
Attention to Detail
Once all the key elements have been sorted as part of planning a hen party, are there any opportunities for little details to personalise the day/weekend to the bride and her husband-to-be?
Not every bride wants to walk around dressed to the nines in bridal accessories, it just might not be her thing so don’t feel it’s something you have to do.
Games are also an excellent way to break the ice upon that first meeting of everyone, as well as being an easy way to fill gaps in the day. Mr & Mrs quiz questions are a fun way to find things out about the bride and groom and to test her knowledge on things about him.
Another fun game I found recently requires hen party guests to write a sentence about the bride, for her to then guess who wrote it. The internet is full of fun Hen do games so choose ones appropriate to the day.
Enjoy the day
Planning a hen party can be super stressful but you have to remember that at the end of the day, as long as everyone is having fun and making a fuss of the bride, your job is done.
From once being a simple night out with L plates, veils and copious amounts of alcohol, stag and hen parties nowadays have suddenly become weekend or week long events that can cost a ridiculous amount of money and cause no end of arguments and fallout between friends.
Remember fellow hen party planners, you can do this!
Has anyone got any other top tips for planning hen parties? Please share!
Until next time x
