On the eve of my 30th birthday, today is my final day as a woman in my twenties and while I am excited by the prospect of turning the page on a new chapter of life, equally I am kinda’ freaking out.
On reflection, my twenties have been amazing, a real roller coaster of experiences and emotions and I do not regret anything. Everything that I have seen, done, loved, lived, visited, worked, lost and found, has all contributed to the woman I am today. My twenties has been my time to get to know me, explore life, take different paths, and experience what the hell I want to, completely guilt free.
I would pour yourself a brew and get some snacks because if you have never been here before, you’re going to be here a while; and if you are a regular reader then you know how much I can write and this post is no different. Get comfy.
Living in the moment, lessons learnt & other Reflections from my Twenties
At the beginning of my twenties, I was doing dental nursing; then I went to university; worked in retail; worked some more in retail; then finally landed my first role in marketing and have spent the remaining years of my twenties working my way up to a role I felt was right for me. One of the reasons I decided to do a degree was because I got conscious to the fact that I was trying out different careers, and I felt employers were beginning to question if I really knew what I wanted. Until going to university to be honest I did not, but instead of guessing what I wanted, I went out and actually held roles in those industries that intrigued me… and this is totally okay. At school you’re pressured almost from the off to work out what you want to do in life and who the hell can possibly truly know without experiencing the working world for themselves? So my advice? Just get out and work! If you need some extra qualifications, go and do them, and if it does not work out, change your path. Of course, it is easier said than done, I do acknowledge that, but you learn little in life without stepping outside of your comfort zone.
My Graduate Experience post tells you (almost) my whole career history life story so read that, but I have written a lot on my time at university and career advice, here are my favourites –
On university –
On career –
Live life in the moment
I am almost bored of my own voice at this point because I am thinking about this every.single.day and my records show this is exactly how I felt last year too! People all across my social feeds have forgotten how to live for today, all they seem to do is have their heads in the future and it’s SO ANNOYING! Everyone can have a favourite time of year, absolutely nothing wrong with that but tell us when we’re in it, not several months ahead. It’s like people that start counting down to Christmas in July, I mean, what the fuck?!
Life goes so fast and as you get older, it feels like time disappears quicker with each passing day. Plan exciting stuff for tomorrow, sure, but make today great too!
Love will find you
Easier said than done, sure, but I think it’s so easy to get distracted by being single, than it is enjoying those months or years spent being able to be 100% selfish with yourself. You can travel, live anywhere, spend your income on yourself… so many things. It can get lonely, but you can be lonely in a relationship too remember, so use your single time for you.
It’s okay to be Lonely
I go through horrible days of feeling desperately lonely sometimes … but it’s okay. I mean, it’s not, but it is. My family all live a good three-hour drive away, my best friends not a lot less, and my husband often works shift patterns that don’t coincide with my typical 9-5pm Monday–Friday work routine. As adults we don’t have the confidence our younger selves did walking into a room and making friends with everybody, in your twenties it can take a lot of courage to try something new on your own and I applaud any one that does this. Similar to the above point, really learn to be good in your own company and find things that you can do comfortably on your own, like going for a coffee.
Friendships will come and go
As an early birthday present, my best friend got a little book printed of photos of the both of us since we were in secondary school and it has probably become one of my most valued possessions. It covers school, prom, birthdays, fun days out, and the roles we held at each other’s recent weddings. Kate and I were inseparable from year seven until Sixth form, then boys got in the way a bit and Kate went off to university while I stayed at home and worked for a bit, so for a few years we drifted apart slightly until life brought us back together.
For the number of friendships you gain in life, you always lose some, albeit some only temporarily. People change and while you might have something in common for a while, it won’t necessarily last as you grow up and change. You also meet new people constantly, particularly in the work place. Learn the friendships you need to keep a grip on and just focus on those… providing you are shown the same effort in return, of course.
Body Confidence & Knowing Yourself
In my very early twenties, I had regular image and confidence hang-ups; my hair was never long enough, I didn’t do my make up right, my boobs weren’t big enough, I could be slimmer, I could be cooler, I could be more advanced in my career. So many things I falsely measured myself against for absolutely no reason, but very normal to experience when you are new to navigating the world for yourself.
Fast-forward 10 years and while I still have body hang-ups and the odd battle with confidence is still an issue, (my social anxiety is a completely different ball game though), I am in equal measure totally okay with myself. If I hadn’t left going to University until I was 22, then sure I might be slightly more ahead in my career and on more money, but actually I am really proud with how far I have climbed in five years. Concerning my body, yeah I hate how my knees look and my stomach isn’t flat but who cares? I do not go to the beach, I do not wear revealing clothing so who actually notices that would criticise… or more accurately, who could criticise me that I would actually give two shits about in return? Nobody.
Doing things for Likes
It doesn’t matter how old or young you are, you always want people to acknowledge the things you say and do. Now we are in this era of social media, the pressure for likes and following is insane. If you want to make something of your blog, or Instagram, then numbers count and you need to grow which is challenging enough without troublesome algorithms going against everything we work hard for. However, similar to the above point about being comfortable with yourself, you learn to form your own opinion, and not just latch onto others to be liked.
What are some important life lessons you have learnt?
Until next time xFollow