On Thursday evening I caught the first episode of Anne Robinson’s Britain on BBC1 and this episode focused on parenting. I was watching fairly unconsciously until Editor-in-Chief of Elle Magazine UK, Lorraine Candy got featured and suddenly I took an interest.
Long-term readers of ClaireySweetie will know how much I admire Lorraine and was lucky enough to meet her a couple of years ago at an event and properly fan-girled (here)!
One thing I learned fairly early on in life, was how to enjoy and be in my own company and be my own best friend. That’s not because I was an only child, or had a lack of friends, but I simply learnt that I haven’t always got to be with people.
Of course there are many times when there’s nothing nicer than having a day out with your best friend or your Mum/partner etc. but in equal measure knowing to be comfortable with yourself is important, particularly when they’re not available or around.
As a child, I went to five different schools owing to my Dad’s career taking us to different areas of the country to live before settling in Devon (where they still are). Then when I was 19, I moved by myself to London to pursue dental nursing for a couple of years, and in 2009 I took myself to University in Bath.
I lived in a shared house for the first year or so, and then for the latter half of my degree I moved into my own little annex where I lived until moving in with Ian after graduating.
To cope with all the moving, I had to not only be okay in my own company, but it also took a level of confidence to be able to continually readjust to new locations and immerse myself within new groups of people. It has been a big blow that in the last few years, social anxiety has taken hold, so I can find new groups of people and unfamiliar places very intimidating.
One of my very favourite things to do alone is to take myself to a coffee shop and enjoy a cappuccino and a book; it’s my perfect me time.
Every now and again, I also have the excuse to properly take myself out for the day and I don’t just mean out shopping (while that may be an element), I mean like to somewhere that gives me the opportunity and the excuse to do a number of things in my own company.
Most recently this was a couple of weekends ago when I took myself into London, met Ella Woodward (of Deliciously Ella) at a book signing, and explored a part of the city I am fairly unfamiliar with; I had a blast!
I think being okay just with yourself is important, I think it’s also one of the quickest and most fulfilling ways to really learn about yourself, what your strengths and weaknesses are, and how to find situations and opportunities to challenge yourself. Some people thrive in groups and others –like me- actually prefer more intimate friendships and relationships with people but it all depends on what you’re used to and like doing.
One of my most recent challenges was my holiday with Trek America last October and as a result, it has become one of the best things I have ever done for myself and forced me to tackle my social anxiety head on.
Tell me about you guys, are you people that enjoy your own company or do you prefer hanging out with friends and family? What are some of your favourite things to do?
Until next time x
Hey Sweeties,
A couple of weeks ago I wrote a post responding to the interview between Diane Sawyer and Bruce Jenner, commenting also on identity and becoming the person who you are. ‘We are all butterflies’ can be read here.
With that in mind, I can’t not now post on Caitlyn Jenner now that she has finally been revealed.
Hey Sweeties,
Today’s post was inspired by an idea that I tweeted on Friday. I was listening to Radio 2 (don’t mock it until you listen to it!) and one of the news items mentioned Hilary Mantel being made a Dame for her services to literature. I got to thinking how long it would be before a Blogger gets made a Dame/knighted/awarded OBE etc. for their services to blogging? Think about it, it could happen.
Blogging (as we know) is now very much a thing, such a thing that those who are involved are taking highly sought after positions of influence and living lives we all want a slice of. Blogging is definitely an art form and in the same way authors, artists and musicians are acknowledged, Bloggers in time will too. It also depends on how blogging will develop, I mean, will it always be regarded as blogging or will it essentially just been seen as writing? YouTube as well, it’s not writing but it is film making, all things that are already acknowledged and rewarded in society and culture.
How many of you reading this, have bought, watched or even been somewhere because a Blogger/YouTuber recommended it? *holds up hand* Yes me to, often. So we know they influence which is why quite rightly they can and do earn from advertising and brand relationships. However, the most successful Bloggers/YouTubers (I don’t need to name names, you know who they are) are now writing books, creating products/merchandise and/or their own cosmetic and beauty ranges. It’s these things (the products of their blogging) that will probably survive them once the blogging thing expires.
Take Nicola and Sam behind Pixiwoo/Real Techniques. Both Makeup Artists that started making YouTube videos and through that has been able to create their makeup brush ranges. But if YouTube went away, they would still be Makeup Artists. Tanya Burr I guess is similar. But what about Zoe/Zoella Sugg? If blogging and YouTube suddenly stopped what would she do? Nothing that she has currently released could sustain her I don’t think. I’m not being mean, I am being realistic.
It’s hard to imagine a time without blogging but like all social media platforms, something in time will probably replace it. One also has to be realistic. I absolutely love blogging, I think about my blog all day long (yes, really), but essentially it’s a hobby or at least it is right now. Writing is what I want to do but there may come a time where blogging becomes no longer necessary or relevant. I will always write, but I may not always blog.
This is why, as much as the blogging lifestyle really appeals and hell yes I would love to quit my day job and do this full time. But equally, in the back of my mind I wonder how secure it really is? Also, when will Instagraming our dinner get boring and photographing every moment of our lives? It’s great we have such a vivid visual record of our time on this earth, so much more than any of the previous generations put together but is there such a thing as photographing too much?
Just some food for thought for you all today…
Until next time x
Hey Sweeties,
While we’re still in the hype of the New Year, I felt this Sunday chat post needed to remain one of reflection. I have already written this week about 2014 and my hopes for the year going forward (here), but it’s since clicking publish have I thought of other things that happened in 2014 that I completely failed to mention such as my opportunities with Elle magazine. I have read some of your posts and those of other bloggers I follow in regards to reflecting on the year now gone and I can’t help but feel like I have become lost, confused, claustrophobic almost with thoughts about 2015; the year now already ticking away as I write.
The past couple of days I have really got hot and bothered about my career which is ridiculous but as you all know, it’s at the top of my list of goals and aspirations and will be for the foreseeable future. I spent the best part of seven years getting myself into the communications industry (read my Graduate Experience) and yet I am now not completely sure this is where I want to be. I wonder now if I just convinced myself I wanted to work in PR and marketing? I enjoy writing press releases but I don’t want to be in PR, I like the creative side of marketing but mostly it’s far too analytical which isn’t me at all therefore I have no desire to progress further down this route. I have also developed a hatred for social media unless it’s for personal use. Oh man.
Ultimately this also narrows down to feeling as though that at 27 years old, I should have my shit together and be a lot further ahead than I am… Although I tell myself and have no doubt mentioned on here previously that there is no rush, that your twenties are for trying out a few things and finding what works for you, I struggle to follow this -my own- advice. Writing is my number one love and if I was given an opportunity tomorrow I would jump at it… But what I don’t want is a role where I am just churning out content for the sake of it rather than for genuine purpose. I also worry that writing can be too isolating and as much as I like getting my head down and working independently, I know it wouldn’t take much to turn me into a hermit & with my battles with occasional loneliness this would be a disaster.
I actually think that having the freedom to try out a few jobs and career options to find the correct fit is not only healthy, but should be encouraged and until you hit thirty, employers shouldn’t necessarily raise their eyebrows at your CV if there seems to be method and lessons learnt from each previous employment. But as someone that has been in that situation and had to explain why -at probably only 21-22 years old- why I was moving from different professions, you do crave stability. This actually was one of the reasons I wanted to go to University so that I could start afresh at graduation and my pre life was merely that. I am also someone that is at my most comfortable when I know where I am going and how I am going to get there and I like to come across like that in interviews, and I do fortunately.
My big goal if you like is that by thirty, I am in a position to start a family (if I wanted to) and to do that, I feel I need to have a career built up enough that it would be ok to take a short break, or it’s something I could do freelance or work flexibly around raising a family. I have a salary in mind and to be honest, thirty is more like thirty-two now but still, I have an aim. This is still the best part of 3 years away, 5 if we’re going for the latter age, it is still all perfectly achievable so I really do need to just chill the fuck out and accept that everything will work out as long as I am keeping myself aware and sharp to the opportunities that become available. I know myself, I just over think and analyse every goddamn thing to the extreme which is why I end up in situations like the one I am busily writing out for you guys now.
One thing I feel I would like to do, is work or be in a position of influence with young people at school leaver age and tell them that trying to decide what you want to do in life is ridiculous until they have gone out into the real world and started experiencing things for themselves. I went to a good school and because I was a hard worker, they were good to me in return, that was until GCSE/A-Level time where I just felt they let me down. I made the decision to not go to University (although I did later) & I found myself in a small group separated from the rest as the school were simply not interested in those not going (to University). Rather than giving us as help and guidance with job applications or advice about alternative further education we were just forgotten. Now, that attitude is (hopefully) almost archaic but I am sure it still exists and schools don’t realise how single minded they are and how actually, they are letting their young people down if University really is the only way they measure student success.
All I am saying, is that just because others seem to have a clear direction outlined, don’t feel that what you’re doing isn’t still leading you in the right direction you think you want to go in. It might not be obvious, but trust your decisions and make use of opportunities when they present themselves, even if you’re not totally sure how it fits in with your life plan. Things have a funny way of working out so trust your instincts, think with your head but follow your heart and I am sure you will be fine.
Until next time x